Over the past few months, I have shared several posts about sketching (or lack thereof), traveling while sketching, and the tools and setup I have been building to improve my sketching efforts. I have been a complete disaster at drawing in a sketchbook my entire life. Bear with me while I try to break this down, as this is likely for my benefit more than anyone else's, but hopefully some of this will ring true and give insight for others who struggle to 'get' sketching.
I will start by saying that after more than fifty years on this planet, spending most of that time making art in one fashion or another, with over twenty-six of those years spent as a professional artist, I have FINALLY figured out how to use a sketchbook and to sketch in it.
I am very much aware that my greatest flaw when it comes to drawing is my quest for the perfect line and the completion of a beautiful finished drawing, every time I pick up a pencil. I have been this way since I was a small child. If the pads of paper I used to draw on still existed, it would be page after page of nearly empty pages with the small start of something that I quickly deemed flawed, and I would abandon the entire sheet of paper and move to the next. Page after page and sketch pad after sketch pad. So much waste and so much frustration for me. I would see others' sketchbooks and would be amazed and frustrated because I simply didn't understand how they made it work.
In many ways, I have always felt like I was running out of time. I didn't, don't, and will never have the time I need to do all of the work I want to do. I wanted and needed to make a finished piece every time I picked up a pencil, and spending time not working towards that goal was time wasted. I realize the jumbled logic there - that I felt like I was wasting time that should be spent drawing ... by drawing. But at the end of the
I have found that I don't need to work things out on paper before I start working. While I do spend a lot of time doing that, it is actually taking place in my head. Nearly all of my concept work, thumbnailing, and planning happens in my head. I would work the piece out, move stuff around, and envision the final before making the first mark. I have the plan and the course, and then I make it. This method has its merits for me, and it has hurdles. But I have made it work for a long time. And because of this, I have had trouble validating the time to spend sketching when I could do it all in my head and then make the final piece. Client work was the place where I would do all the pre-production work. I would make the client's thumbnails and concept designs. I would do the work for them that I really should be doing for myself.
When I started on the Grand Bazaar, I did incorporate some of those steps that I provide to my clients in my own work, but again, it was to facilitate a complex end piece that had a purpose and place. I was, and am, always working toward a larger goal. Most of these days, it is bringing my next illustrated novel to life. But I knew I was missing out. I knew I was not taking the time to fully use my skill sets. Sure, I could artistically run that marathon each and every day, but I couldn't even stretch or practice. I simply expected myself to complete massive feats of
For many years, I always had supplies on me - pencils, pens, paper, erasers, and sharpeners. But if I was sitting around drawing, it was for a finished drawing or a smaller part for a larger project (at one time, it might have even been client work). Never to simply sit and see where things take me. I love to draw. I can draw anytime and anywhere... but not without purpose. And after fifty years, it finally clicked. I finally just started playing in a sketchbook. In my previous posts, I talked about the steps I have taken this year to reach this point. I found the sketchbook that really suits me. And the toned paper, the size, and the binding
Sure, some of this comes from feeling ashamed of my sketches while looking enviously at others' gorgeous sketchbooks. And that is sometimes a hard one to shake. It has affected me throughout my life, and I know many artists deal with it to some degree in their
I am still learning and figuring this all out, but I can confidently say that I think I have cracked the nut. I have to be vigilant. I have to ensure I am using it often (but I will go into this more later) and that it is always near. At the end of the day, I had to change myself, and it was never an issue with the sketchbook or the pens, though having the ones that work best for you is ideal. I have realized I didn't feel comfortable spending the time on something that wouldn't result in a finished piece, a massive confidence issue, and feeling free to make mistakes and have fun with no goal or direction.
UPDATE: I have one additional thought on all of this after I completed writing. One of my problems with working all the time on art for my books or clients is that the working and making art in general became locked to my house and eventually my studio. I have to be in a very specific place to make art, and that was starting to reduce the amount of time I was making art and my enjoyment of it. Once again, I can make art anywhere, and that has been very freeing and a boost to my drive to create.
That's all for another exciting Monday on the blog. See you back next Monday. I will be away from the computer for much of this week. Until then...
